A little down

Well, Hannah is doing better. They started her on a special formula today that is easy on her stomach. She has shown no problems with it thus far. Because they do not know what caused her "spell" Monday they are being very cautious. They have stopped the antibiotics for now and are watching her very close. It breaks my heart to know that my breastmilk may have hurt her. Once again, I feel responsible for her situation. It is so hard to look at you baby, the one that you prayed for for 2 years, lying there with tubes and wires everywhere and you have no control what happens to her. The doctors and nurses have been great, but lately havent been giving us any answers. They simply do not know. I am getting so frustrated. I want to know what is goingto happen in 5 weeks. Will Hannah come home? Will she be on a monitor/meds? Will she need oxygen? Will she need therapy? Will I be able to take vacation? Everything is so up in the air and I cannot work like that. I am a planner, and none of this was in my plan. It is so unfair sometimes. Marcus is trying to be supportive, but he needs support ,too. The only thing that helps is remembering last night when I was kangarooing (holding her skin to skin on my chest) Hannah last night. To feel her little body next to me, to feel her breathe, to have her look at me and know she knows who I am, to finally feel like her mom, was amazing. I never thought I would be a mom of a preemie baby, but I will tell you, it really makes you cherish life and the one you created. Hannah, Marcus, and I will always have a special bond. Not because she is our daughter, but because we have fought through this time, the three of us together. I never want to go through this again, but will never forget this experience.

Sorry, I vented a little! Sometimes it just comes out. We love you all.

Jennifer

Growing...

Hannah now weighs in at 3 lbs 5 ozs. She is doing good. We had a scare last week. One of the doctors thought that she had necrotizing enterocolitis. What is necrotizing enterocolitis? But all of the test came back negative. Thank the Lord!

We are starting to hold her more and more, and that is great. I can't wait untill I can hold her without the permission of a nurse.

Just keep us in your prayers!

Marcus

Red Hair! 

5 Weeks Old 

The Nursery

Whew! The nursery is done! There are some pictures following this post.

Well, we found out Monday morning that Hannah is now 2 lbs 11 ozs. Man, they grow up fast :) But seriously, we are very excited about how good Hannah is doing. God is great!.

Jennifer has been bugging me to get some more hardware for my computer, so I gave in and will be getting a DVD burner. When I do, I will copy all of the movies that we have taken of Hannah and put them on a DVD. Let me know if you would like one.

Please continue to pray for our family,
Marcus

P.S. I would also like to announce that I, regrettably, was not chosen to be the next Pope.

The side table and rocking chair! 

The dresser with hutch! 

The Crib! 

Sassy Girl

Hannah is now off the ventilator... Yeah, she took herself off. She extubated herself last Thursday morning. The doctors saw no reason to put her back on immediately, they were going to give her a chance. She has been holding her own since then. She is still on oxygen by way of a nasal canula, and tolerating it well. Hannah now weighs 2 lbs. 8 oz. Gaining weight slowly but surely. We are now able to change her diapers, hold her more, and dress her. We actually get to play "parents." I gave her a pacifier the other day and she went to town. She is not supposed to know how to suck for a couple more weeks. Finally, she is ahead of the game in something. The doctors still say she is doing well, but she is still learning. She is having to learn to keep her temperature up, circulate oxygen better, and tolerate her feedings.

I hope everyone is well.

Love,
Jennifer

Before she got off the vent, this was her favorite position. 

Love at first sight... 

Holdin Hannah without the vent. 

This is Marcus' wedding ring. 

Looks like D-Daddy! 

Hannah without the vent! YEAH! 

Got Milk! 

Time is going slow

Well, it has only been 2 1/2 weeks since Hannah was born. It seems like forever. We cannot wait for her to be home with us, but we know that she is where she needs to be right now. They have moved her into an isolate, which is a good thing. It helps her learn to regulate her own body temperature and it keeps it a little quieter for Hannah. She is on minimal vent settings and she is breathing excellent on her own. Her tests are still looking good. She is up to 2 1/2 lbs. now. They will weigh her twice a week from now on. Hannah is still eating goodand tolerating the breastmilk, which is a good thing because there is PLENTY more where that came from. The doctors and nurses seem very pleased with her progress. They say she is right where she needs to be. All the nurses say she is a very good and content baby. We are so proud!

Well, I must go help Marcus finish her room. We love all of you!

Jennifer

I am changing everyday. My hair is growing and I even have a cowlic(spelling?) like my Daddy. 

Nana and Hannah...the spoiling has begun. 

Nana came to see my new place. 

See, I have gotten bigger. 

Sound asleep in my new "apartment" 

On top of Mt. Pinnacle with Nana and D-Daddy. 

Double trouble. 

Little bity girl. 

So content. 

Hannah and Daddy! 

Hannah and her mom meeting for the first time. 

Holding Hannah

Well, it is about time! We finally got to hold Hannah for the first time. It was AMAZING! Of course we had to work with the ventilator and feeding tube, but it worked. She is so tiny compared to us. She tolerated it very well. She was a little fidgety at first, but then she opened her eyes and saw who had her and she calmed down. When Marcus held her it was as if she snuggled down into his big arms and just gazed at him. The experience was unimaginable. To know that she is ours and always will be is really cool. It only lasted about 3 minutes for each of us, but I know that it is a feeling neither Marcus nor I will ever forget.

I have also attached some pictures of Maddy and Laney when they came to visit. I sure wish they could have met Hannah. They will have so much fun together when she gets big.